I liked last weeks so much I’m doing it again. This works because a lot of times I have stupid things to share but don’t because blah that’s not worth a whole post and how do I tie it into the other stupid thing I feel compelled to put on the Internet because they don’t “go together” at all? I take things too seriously and I like this format. Plus, my love for alliteration makes sure I keep this somewhat short and weed out the really stupid anecdotes. So away we go.
1. I still haven’t decided whether I like “fitness fund” or “muscle money” better which makes it really sad that the month is [practically] over. I made myself $25. Yeah! I meant to take a picture of my wonderful jar full of dolla dolla bills y’all but I forgot and it’s at home and now I’m at work and I know you’re sad that I’m starting your weekend off by denying you such a joy. I don’t go to the gym on weekends usually because I like to go the one near my work, and not the one near my house, BUT my DVD player now works and last month I bought myself fitness DVDs that I’ve been doing on weekends so that’s why my number is so high. I liked this jar thing, except it took me awhile to get going as I kept forgetting to put $1 in as I never have any cash on me so I had to keep writing “IOU” notes to myself. I think I am going to reward myself for all my hard work and go get a manicure or something. My nails are atrocious. I was drunk one night and saw how chipped they were and so I “filled them in” myself and it looks like a two year old did it. I’m embarrassing.
2. I’ve been talking about going to BodyCombat forever but I haven’t done it because the only time it was offered was inconvenient and got me to work too late. BUT…the location I go to is now offering it Wednesday nights! I am so, so, so excited. It goes to show that if you take absolutely no action and complain about it enough inside your head, things will happen. I think that’s the mantra they advocate in The Secret or something. It’s offered at night, which throws a wrench in my schedule because when you get off work at 3:30…and the class isn’t until 6…there’s not much to do. Refresher, as I live downtown, and work 25 minutes outside of the city and the gym location I like to go to is near work because it’s so much less crowded and the people are nicer. It makes no sense to go home, then drive back and get stuck in rush hour with all the commuters leaving the city. And the pool has closed so there goes that option. So I’m going to have to figure out my Tuesdays too because no way in hell am I giving up my fun Zumba and the adorable teacher. I’m probably going to go to all of the wonderful shopping in the area [yay! uh oh?] or just make Sarah hang out with me. O hai gurl.
3. The Baltimore Grand Prix is this weekend and I can’t hear the sound of all the newspapers and all the interviews from city officials spouting off about how wonderful it is for Charm City’s PR and how lucky we are to be “chosen” and be in the spotlight over the reality of how effing inconvenient it is. They closed alllllll of downtown and it makes getting in or out of the city mission effing impossible. I loathe it with the passion of a thousand trillion suns. I hear Patrick Dempsey (McDreamy) is participating or something so the only way this is acceptable is if he finds me in my house and offers to give me a bunch of money he doesn’t want anymore. Otherwise, if anyone needs me I will be locked in my house this weekend with a pillow over my head [in an ideal world i would be asleep beneath it but], whispering “come and get me when it’s over!” Dramatic party of one? maybe, but it really is the worst ever ever ever ever.
4. You know I love to read. It’s like my full-time job. I made the mistake of reading Gone Girl [by Gillian Flynn] last year on a 5 hour car ride to New Hampshire to visit family friends, which in hindsight, was a terrible error. Because I was miserable all weekend, you know, being social and stuff with people we haven’t seen in years, when all I wanted to do was be left alone on my air mattress so I could readreadread and figure out what the hell was going on and how it would all end. I know people are “eh” about Gone Girl but I loved it because the plot [to my eyes] was so original and fresh, and I really had NO clue how it was going to end. Nada. SO…where is this going…I’ve been looking for a book similar to that and haven’t found any but my boss Sharon introduced me to Jeffery Deaver and the Lincoln Rhyme series. I am obsessed. I’ve torn through 7 of them, and they are lengthy. This is a blaring signal that I need a life. My two favorites are “The Vanished Man” and “The Cold Moon”. Buy them. It’s not the kind of series where you need to read them all or even read them in order. You think you know what is going to happen, then you’re wrong and you think this is going to happen, then you’re wrong, then you think oh! I’ve got it! THIS is totally going to happen, then you’re wrong, then you think okay the book is almost over this is totally how it’s going to happen and you’re fifty shades of wrong. Then the end comes and you’re still surprised. So….get them.
5. Al, the maintenance man who works in our office building is the cheeriest, nicest guy ever. When I started at this job, he asked me my name and I said, of course, “Caitlyn” and he nodded, and said okay. He then started addressing me as “Hey Hayden!” At first I assumed I had heard him incorrectly because I spent my teenage years blaring my i-pod on the loudest possible headphone settings and my hearing ain’t so gewd. Then by time I realized no, he really is saying Hayden, I didn’t know how to politely correct him because though I am awkward, I do try to at least be polite. So for months, he’s called me Hayden whenever he sees me. I figured it wasn’t a huge deal if some man I see every other day or so calls me by the wrong name. Then on Wednesday I’m waiting for the elevator with my company president, and of course, who walks up but Al. “Hey, Boss man! Hey Hayden!” He sings out. I turn scarlet red and suddenly develop an intense interest in counting the dots on the ceiling tiles. The president turns to me and says “Hayden??? Really, CAITLYN? You are something else.” He chuckles for a long time. I sheepishly turn to the maintenance guy and I’m like “I’m so sorry I didn’t know how to correct you!!!” Al thought it was hilarious that I let him call me the wrong name for so long. I was mortified. I feel really bad. I wasn’t trying to be deceitful or anything (although I do like giving out fake names at bars). Blah. I haven’t seen the company president since but I am really hoping this doesn’t turn into some kind of inside joke where he calls me Hayden. Le sigh.