It’s The Freaking Weekend

…..I love them so much, yet they are one of my roadblocks in getting fit.

So I used to struggle with eating healthily during all days of the week but the work week was really hard. Preparation is not my thing. Thinking ahead? Nope. Never has been my style. I wouldn’t pack enough food and I’d get hunger headaches and slump around the office for hours that felt endless or I would just get Skittles and an Almond Joy bar from the vending machine.

I’m finally, finally, finally getting better at eating healthy doing the week. I plan out all my meals and get ‘er done. But now, the weekends. Suddenly I’m 100 times worse on the weekends than I ever was during the work week.

I know that the problem is too much free time, which makes me laugh because I love the weekends for that very reason.

On weekends I really just…have nothing to do. So I eat. It’s something to do. And what I eat on the weekends, I guarantee, is never healthy. It’s always a “bad” food choice and it’s always a LOT of it. I know binge-eating is one of my problems. I know I’m eating because I’m bored, but I can’t seem to talk myself out of it. I knew it was a bigger problem than I thought it was when I woke up last Saturday morning and thought “Oooh. I can go to CVS and buy some unhealthy snack to eat today. My roommates are still asleep so they won’t see me come back into the house with it.” A low point. I’m planning on sneaking back in with junk food, like I’m smuggling drugs. I didn’t want to be caught and I didn’t want to feel ashamed. Way to be, self. Way.to.be. That’s also another alarming facet – that I willingly leave my house to buy bad food. And I don’t talk myself out of it for the 2 blocks that it takes to walk there.

It’s a problem, and I know this. I know it when I’m shoving food down my throat and I feel worse afterward, but then the next weekend rolls around, and lo and behold, there’s bored Caitlyn. I don’t talk myself out of it because I want to do it and I declare that “I’ll burn it off!!! I’ll work-out extra hard!!”

The obvious solution seems to be – well, don’t be bored. Get a hobby moron. Do something. I already read a lot but even I can’t do that for however many waking hours I have.  I need a lot of alone time but maybe too much is too much on the weekends? Last year I used to go to the mall a lot, but this year I am on a girl on a budget. And it’s cold. I thought about going for a run a time or two, but then I’m all “Um well I don’t know where to run so that’s out.” I’ve lived here a year and a half now, and I still don’t know any running or walking routes.

It’s a low point and I’m just…over it. Over constantly putting myself in these positions and giving in and not overcoming. I’m so over figuring one thing out (like healthy eating during the work day) and then another thing comes popping up worse than before. Blah. I know this is all me and I’m forever writing posts like “wah I know it’s my fault but it’s hard and I can’t figure it out and I keep doing it”. I know.  That’s about all I have to whine about today.

WIAW: Messy In Execution

Happy WIAW, people!

Sorry for lack of posts. I have a bunch of posts sitting in drafts that I very nearly almost published but the gloom and doom was too much even for me. Contrary to what those posts would have you believe, the world has not stopped turning and here we all are.  Hi.

Breakfast:

Image

a breakfast that lights up a work day. 

Overnight oats in a mason jar. Cute in theory but messy in execution. That’s my life theme: messy in execution. I’m still so enamored by my overnight oats. So easy and versatile. This batch is Thin Mints Overnight Oats. I was on the phone with my eye doctor in PA, telling him that I lived in Maryland now but I LOVED his practice so so so much that I don’t want to look anywhere else and oh I only have one trip home scheduled in February and I need my yearly appointment, and then the secretary tells me he is booked through end of April. What the hell? You are an eye doctor in suburban Pa not Planet Hollywood in Vegas. Why was I boring you with this? NO not because I hate you,I remember now. Right. So I was on the phone with the eye doctor and I accidentally repeated a step because I was just OMG SO shocked at my eye doctor being A-list suddenly and put the peppermint extract in twice and HOLY strong. It still wasn’t a lot at all but I am a weak woman, friends. It was still really good, filling, chocolate-y and I look forward to repeating.

Lunch:

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I’ve been really craving Chipotle. Like every day. One fine day it dawned on me that Chipotle burrito bowls contained ingredients I had in my refrigerator and I could manage to throw together something resembling it. Verdict: not bad!! It’s pretty hard to mess up but I was trying to make sure the ingredients were healthy. In the mix is lettuce, spinach, carrots, almond slivers, roasted mushrooms, cheese, rice, guacamole, and leftover chicken.

Snack:

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Lara Bar in an artistic photo. The point of the bar being arranged with my work notes is to show the juxtaposition between this exciting snack and boring stock numbers of the books we publish. Although I prefer stock numbers to long-ass ISBNS any ol’ day. In case you were wondering. You weren’t. Next.

Post-work snack:

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Smoothie bowl. I used to overthink smoothies but I finally realized that they also are hard to mess up. In here is mango, strawberries, blueberries, vanilla greek yogurt, unsweetened vanilla almond milk,  spinach, vanilla protein powder, xanthan gum. Ignore the lone strawberry. I accidentally excluded it from the blender so I just plopped it on top for decoration (and later consumption).

Dinner:

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SO. I baked chicken Sunday night and took this photo. I ate Steamfresh vegetables on the side. The rest of the pictures were taken Monday, hence the leftover chicken appearing in my lunch bowl. I felt that I needed to explain. This chicken doesn’t look that great but it’s deceiving you. I so wish I could remember where I found it. But it was some olive oil, dijon, honey. Then plain bread crumbs. I threw almond slivers on top. My co-worker tried it and proclaimed it “amaze balls.” Success. When pre-heating the oven to make this, I accidentally set the fire alarm off. I was flipping out and it took eons to turn off (translation: probably 90 seconds). I don’t understand why it went off, as I was only setting it to 375 degrees and it was the first time it was being turned on in hours. The stove scares me enough, and now the oven is turning against me too. Fine.

Thanks to Jenn for hosting!

The Way I Think

Hey. Thanks so so much for all your comments on my last post. Sometimes I wonder why I blog, then I read other peoples blogs, comments on other peoples blogs, comments on my own blog, and…I remember exactly why. To hear I’m not alone. I love social media and I also hate it because seeing everyone’s statuses squealing about getting promotions or getting the coolest job ever, Instagram pictures that feature the hashtag “#engaged” and whatever, gets me reallll down in the dumps. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy for everyone and when I comment ‘congrats! happy for you!’ I mean it (most times), but sheesh, I hate that their happiness/success makes me feel like shit about myself. I feel angry and saddened that (it appears) everyone is moving forward yet I am like a hamster on the wheel that never gets anywhere, forever chilling on the very bottom. Being grateful every day is not something that comes easily to me. Neither does self-acceptance (believe me we know, think longtime readers of this blog).

I was thinking today about how I always dwell on all the things that I’m not and all the things I don’t have, instead of all the things that I am and all the things that I do have. What brought this revelation on was when I was at the mechanic/neighbors picking up our plentiful packages [oh the holiday season], and one of the mechanics said to me, “I thought you should know that when your package came today, as so-and-so signed for it, he said ‘Oh good, that means Caitlyn will come by today.’ We all look forward to your appearances because you make us laugh.” I was so stunned/touched by this, I think I stuttered a thank you, resorted to my standby self-deprecating humor bout how that’s the first time I ever heard somebody say they were looking forward to seeing me, we all laughed, I walked away smiling and hadn’t stopped smiling since. Whenever I’m at the neighbors, I am just trying to not be my always awkward self, and I never thought what they might see or take out of the brief exchange because I always just assume my jokes are stupid, that they’re counting the seconds until that awkward neighbor leaves. I always see the worst. I think I’m awkward, I’m always going to be awkward, but that’s not what other people necessarily see. These neighbors don’t know how I see myself.

I pout too often about how I don’t like my weight right now, but I ignore the positive changes I have made.  I was staring at my grocery cart in the check-out line the other day and I couldn’t believe that it was my cart, full of stuff picked out by ME. Two years ago I probably wouldn’t have been able to tell you what egg whites were. Or why too much sodium was a problem. Or what almond milk was. Or what Greek yogurt was. and why it was different. Two years ago when I went to the grocery store, I completely ignored the perimeter of the grocery store. I never bought produce. Ever. I bought cookies, crackers, bagel bites, ice-cream, cheez-its, pop-tarts. All I drank was soda, alcohol and the occasional water with Crystal Light. I’m pretty confident that I never, ever, ever hit my suggested veggie intake. Now I fill my cart with egg whites, fat-free Greek yogurt, cranberries, spinach, bananas, strawberries, almonds, carrots. I think and care about things like my veggie intake everyday and make smoothies or small salads to accommodate if I realize it’s low. I pause to dwell on if I am drinking enough water – and sometimes, I even drink more water than recommended. I limit myself to one soda or one Crystal Light a week, and sometimes I go without them.

I get borderline depressed when I look at my bank account and remember how poor I am. But if I frame the situation another way,  I  feel proud that while my bank account doesn’t end with as many zero’s as I’d like it to, I’m living on my own in a new city, paying bills, and am still managing to save something.  When I moved to this city, I lived here for 4.5 months without any income. I’m proud that I managed to make it work and am still here making it work and learning about living on my own. I personally have a lot to learn about how to be an adult and live on my own.

Not only do I tend to have a distaste for where I am in my life and dwell on all the things that I’m presently not, I am guilty of pigeon-holing myself and accepting what I  let myself think I can never be. Make sense? Probably not. I know I hold myself back and don’t take chances because “well, obviously, that’s not for me, that’s for people cooler/more successful/more talented than me. I won’t be able to do that.” It’s sobering to realize I severely underestimate myself and cut myself off from fun things. Shouldn’t I be my own advocate? My biggest  cheerleader? It’s sad to realize I’m always my worst critic – and yes, I know I’m not alone in that. I’m training for a 12 miler in August (!!!!!) which I NEVER thought I’d do. Those kinds of things were obviously for runners only and I can never be a runner because .. hello..look at me, my name is Caitlyn, it’s not in my DNA, I suck at everything forever and ever amen. I’m still not 100% convinced I’ll be able to pull it off but I try to banish those thoughts and just focus on going a teensy bit further than I did yesterday.  I always thought it’d be so cool to be a half-marathoner but never pursued it because of who I thought I was and who I just accept that I am. Lazy, afraid, doomed, terrible at everything,hopeless. Yes, I’m lazy, but I can overcome that. Yes, I walked a nearly-20 minute mile in 7th grade and hated it every second, but why oh why still think about that 10 years later? It was a stupid grade school fitness test, it should have nothing to do with today, and the Caitlyn back then was most definitely not the Caitlyn of now. Thank God.

Really I get so angsty about how I’m not where I want to be, but I don’t stop to think about where I am, compared to where I  have been. Sure it’s not as fast and the results aren’t as sudden as I’d want them to be, but they are there. The littlest of results. Things – good things – will happen if I keep chugging along. Even if it feels like I’m getting nowhere. Good things are there. I just have to pay more attention and readjust what view I’m looking at.

WIAW: Blogging From The Train

Good morning! Linking up with Wednesday’s top woman, Jenn.

I’m Williamsburg bound and blogging from the train.  I feel all grown up, taking a cab and getting on the train all by myself. I was nervous that I’d accidentally board on the wrong platform and find myself in San Diego. My mom, upon hearing this fear last night, laughed and reminded me I had taken a train when I was five going on a family trip to Boston. At that age I was only paying attention to my parents and the next time they turned their backs I could swat my brother, so that reminder was useless, Mom.  Anyway…I felt like such a sophisticated, cool cityslicker. I imagined, as I got out of the cab and walked into the train station, that Suddenly I See by Kt Tunstall was playing. Attention, woman sitting behind me because I think there is a 1 in a million chance you’re reading this, stop kicking my seat, please and thank you. This train ride is going to take 5 more hours and the novelty of riding the train is already wearing off.

Onto the eats, typed up real quickly because typing on a train is weird. I am well aware that most of the meals here don’t look good but don’t write any of it off. It’s not the foods fault., most of this is my inability to take pictures.

Breakfast:

I’ve been eating The Oatmeal Artists’ applesauce overnight oats for a week now. I was hesitant of how applesauce would be with oats and thought the consistency might be absolutely disgusting, but I hereby deem it a winner. Congrats, applesauce overnight oats.

oats1

Snack:

bread

Consumed: Two slices of Cinnamon Raisin Ezekiel bread.

Pictured: One slice of Cinnamon Raisin Ezekiel bread.

Lunch:

scramble

No recollection how this mess came together (maybe I was drunk after work puttering around my house? all too likely) but every day I finish the whole thing which is sadly a big accomplishment around these parts. In here we have egg whites, cilantro, corn, microwaved string cheese, spinach, rice,  feta, and roasted mushrooms. I call it a scramble because I don’t know what else to call it. Funny story about mushrooms (I start way too many sentences this way), I used to think they were disgusting until one day I was at a party, they were there, I was adventurous, tried some and now I could eat them like candy. I roast them like another great Caitlin does. Anyway…topping it is Cowboy Caviar salsa from Trader Joes- this stuff is so good and it gets an A rating in Fooducate, so basically I’m waiting for Trader Joes to approve my petition to start a fan club. I’ll keep you posted, don’t fret!!!

Snack:

chocolte

I was craving some chocolate and so I dug into weight watchers caramel chocolate bites. These weren’t spectacular (duh) but they satisfied my craving.

Dinner:

photo-54

Snack:

Some honey wheat braided pretzels & a granola bar. No picture but I’m sure if you think real hard and use your imagination, you can visualize this.

I’m sooooo not excited for the whole “working” part of the trip, but I’m excited to be in this historic town and socialize with ye olde colonial folk.  The spirit is willing, but the flesh will probably be weak. I just paraphrased Jesus so it’s probzzz time to end this. See ya.

A Little More Conversation, A Little More Action

As I’ve mentioned before, I have many issues about talking about my weight. I just can’t talk about it with family or friends because I think it’s so embarrassing. I wasn’t planning on telling my family about my resolve to get my act together, health and fitness, wise. I just wanted to show up somewhere and be all ‘Oh?’ But I slipped and now they know.

In post linked above, I talked about how I didn’t want to go home because they were all so excited to see “the new me!” And I was scared of their expectations. And you know what, I did go home, they thought I looked “good” but could look “better.” No shit, Sherlocks, I think was my gentle reply. My mom still grabbed one of my stomach rolls (while I was sitting down, for God’s sake. Not a fair playing field) and said ‘Not there yet!’ which hurt but I didn’t let totally annoy me whereas normally I’d stew about it all day. I’m finally grasping that I don’t need to apologize or feel bad about things taking time because I’m A) doing it the right, healthy way which just happens to be a slow way and B) still have many of those days where I oversleep and don’t go to the gym or eat a cupcake (or two) when my co-worker brings them in. Although yes, I do have to remind myself of that quite frequently.

Now after hearing about my endeavor, my whole family has jumped aboard the ‘get fit’ train. Through the years, we’ve all packed on the pounds and none of us were making great decisions with food. Except for my dog Maggie. She remains flawless. My mom admitted she was so impressed by my getting up at 4 am (as she knows how hard it is for me to part from my bed) and trying to learn to eat healthy that she was inspired to finally get her own health back on track. Plus, and I think this is the biggest part, she realized she is one year away from the age her dad (my grandfather) was when he walked out to get the mail on a hot August day and had a fatal heart attack.

My parents are aiming to lose 40-50 pounds each. Before I was born, my dad was an avid amateur cyclist who participated in races and loved toying around with bikes. All the neighborhood kids would bring their bikes to him and “Melvin” –when my parents moved in, he jokingly told the kids to call him Melvin, which they of course gleefully ran with ha– would fix their bikes up and help their parents teach them how to ride. When my parents had us kiddos, he stopped biking and his free time went to us. He’s looking to get back into that, after two and a half decades off. He’s also now gotten into stand-up paddle-boarding down at our shore house in Ocean City, NJ which is supposedly one of the best workouts out there.

My mom has never been an avid exerciser and over the years  she’s developed bad eating habits like the rest of us. She is now seeing a dietitian once a week who put her on a seriously restrictive diet and she’s already down 20 pounds in three weeks (!!!). I give her so much props because I just could not do it. My sister is looking to lose 10 pounds, gain muscle and finally learn proper eating habits for the rest of her college days. My brother is looking to gain back muscle and lose his beer gut from college.

Where I am going with this is that even though I had no intention of telling my family about my quest to get fit and shape up my eating habits, it happened and I actually couldn’t be happier about it because it sparked THEM to do something about it. We just completed our first family 5k on Sunday! Much as they can piss me off, I’m ecstatic that it looks like my parents will be around longer to piss me off occasionally and enjoy those grandchildren I might eventually have. I’m slowly getting over my weird little insecurities, although it’s hard and uncomfortable, and so we’re having family discussions and comparing notes on new healthy foods we’re trying. It’s a team effort now and we’ll all get to the finish line at different times but…we’ll each get there when we get there.

and yes i know that’s not the song title.

 

Letting Myself Talk and Making Myself Listen

Through trying to get fit and learn some things about how to be healthy, I am not only learning things about health, but……me. Duh, right? I feel like I knew that might happen but didn’t want to get my hopes up that I’d learn much beyond “Oh..I still can’t touch my toes? I assumed that would happen at some point after I stopped checking in 8th grade?? What B.S.” The other day I was on my hands and knees actually scrubbing my bathroom floor (my bathroom thankfully doesn’t have a window but if it did I’m sure I would have been distracted by all the pigs flying right outside of it and not finished) and I realized I was hungry. I still had a little bit more floor to clean so I kept going but I began thinking about me being hungry.

Looking back especially over my college years, I don’t know how often I actually felt hungry. When I was lounging in bed watching Million Dollar Listing LA marathons I’d grab Goldfish by the handful out of those gigantic cartons because it felt natural. I’d do this for hours and those cartons were endless. I don’t know if I was ever really hungry, but it was just what I always did: Lounge in bed watching Bravo while eating. It all went together. When my roommate left for class I’d go get the box of cookies and eat an entire sleeve because I was alone and I could, because nobody was there to see or judge. Was I hungry? I don’t know. Maybe eventually I trained myself to equate being alone with feeling hungry. I ate because I could and because I just wanted to eat mindlessly without thinking about it or anybody knowing.

Now that I live in a house with my own room with my own TV, whenever I would buy the junk food I would just bring it straight up to my room concealed where if I ran into a roommate that they wouldn’t see what it is. I kept the junk food in my room because I definitely did not want to run into my roommates in the kitchen or on my way back up the stairs as I’m lugging the gigantic carton of Goldfish up to my room and feel ashamed.

The first thing I did to address this was to, for the most part, stop buying junk food. And if I did, I wouldn’t allow myself to keep it in my room. So it’s not as mindless and easy to just reach for the bag of doritos from my floor. I have to be mindful and pay attention to my body and the signs that I’m hungry then actually go downstairs to grab a snack. Before, my body never really had the chance to ever communicate with me and let me know it was hungry (on second thought: or even really get hungry a lot of the time), I was just shoving food down it regardless and overstuffing myself because I could.

Now before I go to snack I pause and make myself think about if I am actually hungry,  if I’m just bored or doing it out of habit. This has been instrumental. If I think “well, yes I am actually hungry” I drink at least half a glass of water first just to make sure I’m not mistaking my thirst for hunger. If I’m still hungry then, then I will snack. But for a while, I’d feel annoyed that I was hungry, because as I alluded to a few posts back in a frustrated post that was a long time coming, healthy eating and I are still figuring each other out and I just want to crave healthy things dammit.

So, now I am working on that. Allowing myself to get hungry so I can start to learn and recognize the signs of hunger (being even more irritable than my usual self is one of them, hehe) then not getting annoyed at being hungry. I went grocery shopping last Friday (along with everyone else preparing for Memorial Day, ugh that was dumb and a miserable experience) and this weekend found how much I LOVE celery with hummus. I got a few healthy snack ideas from blogs- especially a string cheese quesadilla from Julie that I had for the first time a week-ish ago and love, so simple but I probably would have never thought of it, sadly. Finding snacks I love -like the bananas and the new PB I think is healthy also from my most recent  WIAW post– takes time and lots of trial/error but when I find winners it feels almost close to Christmas.

It’s only been a week, but I’m heartened by the fact that I especially ate so well over a long holiday weekend and last weekend. Weekends are usually when my eating habits are the worst. So much spare time. Nothing at all to do. When I have found myself hungry over last few days, I haven’t been annoyed. I’ve been proud to feel and recognize the signs. I’m pretty good about eating healthy at work since I usually have to plan it out.

Snacking and I are also starting to come to terms that a snack can be more than a granola bar and that I don’t have to be ashamed to have a snack. It’s natural! You’re supposed to eat more than breakfast, lunch and dinner. I  am also now realizing after my few wonderful good eats days that I could maybe string together a whole lot of good eats days. My good eats days are GREAT (I think) as long as my refrigerator is stocked. Once the produce goes bad or I’m out of things to eat, it takes me a while to go to grocery store because I hate going and the crowds overwhelm me (if only Trader Joes opened at 7 instead of 9). So that is when I fall into terrible eating habits. Really terrible eating habits. I also don’t like to go grocery shopping because I buy a lot, I have three roommates who buy a lot and I hate rearranging the fridge and freezer to fit everything (translation: I’m not good at it and get SO FRUSTRATED). What a sad tale, right? Moral of story is if I’m not so lazy, I could possibly be healthy ALL THE TIME. So shocking. Not.

While I’m not yet booking any parades, it feels good to finally feel like I’m starting to right the ship and figure it all out. I formerly had a snarky line written right here that was like “but of course you could check this blog next week and find i fell off my newly established perch in the wagon right back into my own bag of spicy sweet chili doritos” but no! No negativity! And if I do find myself in a bag of spicy sweet doritos, there’s no need to beat myself up over it. I can easily get back on track since I’m starting to come to terms with snacking and  finding healthy snacks I really like. Finally realizing that it is not the end of the world everytime I have a cookie someone brings to a meeting (it’s rude to say no!! heh) and that I can easily get back on track is a pretty cool feeling.

WIAW #4: The One Featuring Bananas

Thanks to Jenn at Peas and Crayons (is it weird I imagine she’s probably one of the nicest people ever?) for hosting and for insuring I never, ever get anything done on Wednesdays because I’m too busy:

A) reading WIAW blogs

B) being hungry

C) salivating on my keyboard thus making it ineligible for productive work use and only productive work use

D) making lists that say things like BUY/TRY CHIA SEEDS FOR BREAKFAST RECIPE IN THAT ONE BLOG ON WIAW IT SEEMS KIND OF EASY

Here is the line-up from yesterday!

WIAW

Breakfast:

Chobani no-fat vanilla, Fiber One chocolate squares (will never stop thanking the adorable Jessie for the idea of adding them from a few WIAW’s ago), strawberries

yogurt

there is yogurt under there, promise.

Snack:

Watermelon slices. I’d forgotten how good watermelon is but I’ll tell ya again- TRADER JOES IS IMPROVING MY LIFE. I told my mom I was eating watermelon and she nearly passed out, sputtering “You? cut a watermelon?!!!” So in the interest of full disclosure I bought vatermelon vedges and did not hack up a watermelon. Pre-sliced fruit is so, so, so wonderful. My mom claims it doesn’t taste as good when it is pre-sliced but I am so lazy and uncoordinated I don’t think I will ever care.

I also learned that it’s fine to eat the white watermelon seeds but Rugrats has scarred me forever and so I will continue to needlessly pick them out.

watermelon

Lunch:

Salad. My love for salad has been reignited thanks to finding Trader Joes lettuce & balsamic dressing. But they were still leaving me a little hungry. So I bought all the things and dumped ’em in: lettuce, feta, walnuts, almonds, broccoli, green bell peppers, onions, carrots, celery, beans. Oh my. If I didn’t have one hand so devout on digging in so I could shove fistfuls in my mouth I would have been clapping. Can I call this a power salad – y/n? I love it.

I have a post about this coming tomorrow but finding healthy things that I REALLY LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is so delightful.

salad

Snack 2:

Banana and PB. I bought bananas after sending this frantic, pathetic, should-probably-be-embarrassed SOS e-mail to my co-worker from the aisle at Trader Joes.

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………yep. I can never remember what color means what stage and when I like ’em best. It’s not even like it should be that hard. THERE ARE THREE COLORS INVOLVED!! For the record, Caitlyn, in case we forget again we’re documenting it here: Yellow-brown.

banana

It was my first time in a long time having bananas (yeah we’ll go with that excuse) and this was my first time trying this PB. The consistency was strange at first bite but I think I can dig it.

Dinner:

A microwave-able meal.

healthy choice

Snack:

Whole wheat tortilla w/ microwaved string cheese. Nabbed idea from Julie. Corn and salsa on the side. YUM!

quesasdilla

You didn’t ask but I’ll always tell. Here’s what I drank:

7.5 glasses of water!!! I got a water tumbler thing for Christmas that I use at work and just bought another for $1 at Walmart to use at home. I guzzle down water in those things. Cups just aren’t as motivating, I guess. Last year (aka: college) all I drank was diet sodas and Crystal Light. Oh, and lots of alcohol. I only drank water sans Crystal Light when I was hungover. Yikes. This year I cut soda but still would drink only Crystal Light. So I worked on cutting the Crystal Light. It’s a little sad because I LOVEEEEEEEEEEE the peach mango and I imagine there are flowing rivers made of the stuff in heaven, but it’s a switch that I deemed important to make because I do actually love water on its own and so there really is no reason to only drink it with Crystal Light. I can definitely do without it (although I’ll still have it from time to time) and all of its artificial sweeteners in my system every day. Woohoo..go me. I realize now, after reading so many helpful blog post comments, that it’s important to let myself feel all kinds of proud and happy whenever I make a healthy change; even though it sounds miniscule…it’s not.

beyonce go girl shaking it

Go visit Peas and Crayons for better WIAW’ers who probably have superior banana knowledge.